Has it Really Been a Month?!!?

Ok wow i just realized it has almost been a month since I last posted!! Yikes! Thats way too long!!

Well a lot has been happening in between that time!!! I've just been really enjoying my daughter and my friends and my parents.

I*m still working for sarah and I*m still loving it!:)

Being a mother is so great!! Its so rewarding! My daughter is so awesome! I*m serious! For a 1 year old she is so cool! Her best friend is and 8 year old who loves her to death and Brooke loves to play with all the neighborhood kids who just love her so much! She fits right in! Dont get me wrong we have our tough times, Brooke and I, but we have more laughs than tears! She is just all around an amazing kid!

Well tomorrow is my dad's birthday(dont ask me how old he is!) and since I*m "low" on funds I decided to clean the house top to bottom! My dad is a neat freak! So for him to come home tomorrow(hes working today and since hes a fireman hes gone all night) with a clean house it will make him happy and less stressed out!!:)

Tomorrow is also court for me! I*m not nervous or scared though because I have God on my side!! It also helps to have an amazing lawyer!:) Seriously I finally found my great lawyer! It took me 2 tries cause I interviewed this other lawyer and I didnt get a good vibe from her so we looked elsewhere and found this other guy who is so great! Hes funny and honest and easy going!! Our personalities go so well together so he makes me feel better when we have a meeting together!! So court tomorrow is not gonna be a big deal we are just going to get a continuance b/c its a hearing and we need a trial. A hearing is just 15mins and we need alot more time than that!

Another new thing in my world is my boyfriend Nick. I know what you all are thinking....What happened to no dating?? Well as soon as I said it out loud and really prayed about it and talked about it with alot of different people I decided I am still going to date just set my limits. I am def not going to be having sex before my wedding night! I have known Nick for a long time now and hung out with him during the summer I just never really liked him because of the people I was hanging out with. As soon as I stopped hanging out with those people and I started talking to Nick again and was able to form my own opinion about him I was like WOW where did he come from?! lol. He is such a great guy! He's my age and lives in the town next to mine and hes in the Marines! Right now hes over in Iraq fighting for our Country!!! So I don't get to see him again for 5 months and 20 days! lol But he's totally worth the wait!

Hmm....well its getting late and I gotta get up really early so I will post more with in the next couple of days!!

Have a great week everyone! God Bless!

God Continues To Amaze me!

Today I didnt have brooke so I did a bunch of things that i cant do when i do have her. Well after driving around on my gas light all morning i was gonna stop for gas but i decided not to cuz i wanted to get home and shower cuz i was all gross from working out. So I went home showered and got ready to go back out pick up my picture i dropped off then get some gas in my car. So I was at the gas station, which by the way i was going to put off until the morning before church because I dont like filling up my tank for some odd reason. Well I get out to go prepay and this guy(and his friend) that was standing in front of the gas station he was prolly 22 or 23, was checking me out the whole time walking in and walking out. I was thinking what is with this guy!? He asked me a question on my way back to the gas pump. I have a tattoo on my lower back and i guess u could see alittle of it sticking out of my shirt so he asked me what it was. I told him it was a butterfly and i walked away thinking nothing of it. As I am pumping my gas that guy who asked me about my tattoo's friend came over to me and layed a line on me that I*m guessing he thought i had never heard before. "Has anyone told you today how beautiful you are?" Lame huh? lol Well i replied with a "yea of course" lol joking with him. Anyways he started talking to me and tryin to sell me magazines. He started asking me what i like to do.....do i like to party?.....do i like to go clubbing?? I told how I used to do all that but I have cleaned up my life and how i enjoy to go to church. Well it turns out he and i have similar interests and so it was ez for both of us to talk and i really started to tell him about my past and where im at now and how God has really changed my life! I invited him to church and told him a little about whats going to be going on like water baptism and a lunchion and that Pastor Joe is going to be ordaning other ministers. He actually seemed really interested! He's leaving town 2morro cuz with his job he travels but I*m really hoping and praying that he comes to Empower!!

I just couldnt believe the opprotunity God gave me! 2 times in 1 week! God showed me Andrew's courage and strength when he witnessed to those "thugs" the other day and he gave me the same courage to witness to this guy at the gas station. Its like i hve been talking to God about my faith and he shows me that by my faith in him he provides! He surely provided when i asked him to show me how to be a witness so i can tell others about Him! God is soooo Good!

Hunger Pains

The other day I was so hungry that when I went home I made a big meal of eggs, toast, waffles, bacon, milk and oj!! Needless to say it really hit the spot! Some times I feel like theres a hunger in my spiritual stomach! Thats when i listen to worship music or some preaching and teaching, read a book, or get into His word so i can fill my hunger! God has just been giving me a feast to eat from lately too! I have been so blessed its awesome! He is just doin some great things with my life recently. It seems like everytime I call on Him and ask Him about a certain topic He shows it to me almost immediately! I've really been talkin to God about my faith and how I*ve been feelin like my faith meter was low and how i really need Him to show me and teach me about faith; it seems like everytime i turn on the radio or go to church or read a book or w/e its about faith! He has been opening my eyes to so many things and its awesome! God is showing me first hand that if i ask and believe He will show me the answer and have faith, He does every time, it never fails.

I was just askin God the other day about being a witness to others and how i want him to show me how to do that. Well it never fails that He gave me the opprotunity to see someone do that! Tonight I was over at the Barlow's and after dinner the kids(minus sarah) nancy and i went to the park for a little bit. There were some guys there sitting at the park bench drinkin and doing some things that werent so good, when we were about to leave Andrew came up to us and said he wanted to go talk to those guys about Jesus.(let me tell you, these guys were ghetto/ganster kinda guys so they were kinda scary!) So Nancy started to walk home with the kids and Andrew went over to talk to these guys. I wasnt gonna go over and talk with him bit i felt i should be there with him and atleast be prayin in the spirit. I started to walk over to talk with him to the guys but i stopped and looked at Andrew and i could see this shield in front of him! I just stood there for a minute staring at it! It was clear kinda like a bubble and it went from the top of his head down to the ground! It was the coolest thing ever! Well we talked to these guys for a while, well Andrew talked to them for a while. lol It was awesome tho for me to see him have the guts to walk up and talk to these guys about his faith in Jesus! I mean how cool is that!? And I was just talkin to God about how I want to share my faith with others but I needed him to show me how! God is so good!

Also the other night Sarah, Andrew, Natalie, Josh, and I went to the Faith Confrence at Living Word to hear Jesse Duplantis speak and boy oh boy was I blessed! His message was great! Tomorrow night Creflo Dollar will be speaking and i encourage you to go and get blessed! Have a great weekend!

What Am I Gonna Do About It?!?

I Love watching my dad play with brooke! hehe! It is such a blessing having a great realtionship with my dad! I was worried that brooke would never really know her dad b/c when i was pregnant Aaron(brookes dad) wasnt around. I know now that Aaron loves Brooke very much and really enjoys spending time with her and he continues to put my worries and fears behind me as he asks more and more to spend time with Brooke on a regular basis! Although we are still goin through all the court stuff Aaron and I have patched up our relationship and we talk to eachother like the adults that we are. He and I will never be 2gether again and I am totally ok with that b/c i know God has an AMAZING husband already picked out for me! I have also made the decision to not date anymore so I can save my whole heart for my husband. This also helps me to keep my heart where it belongs(with God) for the time being that way when it comes time to give my heart to my husband i will have all of it to give and not just broken pieces left for him. I*m finding that seeking council through friends, listening to preachings and teachings and also getting into God*s word has given me a totally new outlook on dating and relationships! In the past I was always so worried about guys liking me and thinking i was beautiful but I have come to realize that its not about my outward beauty its about the beauty on the inside. Who cares if guys see you when youre not wearing make up or your hair isnt exactly how you want it or if youre not wearing your perfect outfit b/c none of that matters. Your husband is gonna love you for your inside and not your outside(your beauty on the outside is just a bonus, its icing on the cake!). Another thing I*m working on is MODESTY(dun dun dun!!!) lol. I never really understood why girls need to dress appropriatly. Now i do! Girls/Women, we need to help the boys/men from sinning with thier eyes! If we dress "sexy" and have our you know whats hanging out all the time that makes the guys have certain temptations, we cause them to think bad thoughts! I never knew that until someone pointed it out to me! So what am I gonna do about it?! I*m gonna do the right thing and help myself and my brothers in Christ by dressing modestly! Now that doesnt mean you cant look nice either! There are plenty of ways to dress modestly and look beautiful!

Oh and I have to share this with you!!! God is so good! I have really been getting into the word and listening to alot of preaching on Faith b/c in my life i feel like my Faith meter is runnin kinda low. So I have been making Faith lists of things I need in life just little things like essecials(mascara, eyeliner, toothpast, things im running real low on). Neways I*m running low on cash lately since i dont work that much and Aaron doesnt pay child support anymore so I*m REALLY tryin to save! Well last night I looked in the fridge and there was no milk left to give brooke a bottle and no one was home so Brooke and I ran to the store to get some milk. Now heres the thing, I*m down to my last $20 and as I*m walking into the store I told myself no wandering eyes! Don*t be tempted to buy other things!! I have a tendency to wanna spend my money when I shouldnt. So I put Brooke in the cart went to the back of the store got her milk(which was on sale Praise God!) and as I*m walking back to the front to pay i just so happened to go through the make up isle and i wanted so bad to get my eye liner and mascara but I said no to temptation! I was so proud of myself! Ok well when I went to the register and he rang up the milk and i used my Domnicks card to get the sale price the card didnt go though so i used it again and the guy goes ok now it works....guess what the total price of the milk was?! 53cents!!!!
Can you believe that!? I was like what?!?!? That cant be right! It was right! I got some kind of discount for something!!!! I believe God gave me that discount! I didnt have a wandering eye and i didnt submit to temptation and God saw that and blessed me!!! Praise God! Thats all i could say was Praise God! God is so good! Well anyways just thought I would share that!! Have a blessed week!

My First Day @ Work!! I Love My Boss!! Heheh!

Ok so yesturday was my first day of work @ Sarah Anne Photography!!! YEAAAAA!! It was so much fun! I got alot done too and Sarah and I have such big plans for the office!!! Lets just say I*m totally pumped about my new job!!! Lol So after work Natalie Sarah and I went shopping @ OakBrook Mall and had a BLAST! We went to this Thai resturaunt and had the YUMMIEST food ever!!(DJ we got ur favorite! lol) After we ate we shopped for a little bit then went onto the computer store to play photobooth!! That was fun even tho the store smelled like sweaty men! lol. The whole shopping trip was us just laughing and being silly the whole time. Thats one of my fav things to do is be silly! When shopping was over we went back to the house to do a few things and wait for Andrew so he could come with us to Lake Ellyn! While we waited for Andrew to get home me and Natalie got sneaky and went on his myspace b/c she knows his password and put a really scary pic or me and nat as his primary pic!!!! Andrew didnt like that very much tho ahaha. Lake Ellyn was great tho! It was very peaceful!! And we all linked arms and started skipping and singing "We*re off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of Oz" hahah we are such dorks but its ok! lol Neways I made a **slideshow** so go check it out!!!

"Did you get the memo??" lol

Being back home has opened my eyes to alot of different things and helped me make some pretty big decisions. I finally realized my place in the world and that is to be here in IL where my family friends and people who love and support me are. Not to say that the people like my brother sister in law and others in AZ dont love and support me; I*m just saying IL is where I need to be right now.

Sunday night I went over to the Barlow household which is always always a blessing for me in more ways than one! Going over there gave me a chance to sit down and talk with Joe and Nancy(who are like my 2nd parents to me) and talk about alot of things and pray about eveything that has really been going on with me on the inside and on the outside. They gave me an outsiders perspective about the decisions I have been making lately and showed me that I really need to make some life changes! I find myself getting a harsh dose of reality when i sit down and talk with them and maybe for some people that sucks but for me I couldnt be happier. Joe especially is willing to keep it real and not sugar coat things like alot of my friends and family often do. Thank God for that!

Monday was court and I was real nervous about it because I didn*t have enough time to hire an attorney. On the way to the court house God told me something that really put me at peace. Up until that moment I had heard nothing from God yet I keep praying. He told me in a very clear and bold voice "Debbie, I am your lawyer today!" WOW!! I was like ok God!! I mean seriously He blew me away! He also put in my head "If God is for us who can be against us" I kept repeating that over and over and over in my head. He really put peace in my heart! I went into that court room with God by myside! Aaron*s lawyer called me in the hallway and we reached an agreement to have this all moved to Kane county since he filed it in the wrong county b/c it was faster and cheaper for them. So Aaron has to pay a penalty fee for having it moved to the right county and I have a few more weeks till the next court date. Which also gave me time to hire my lawyer(which I did yesturday!!)! I*m now taking a stand in faith that God will provide the money for the lawyer fees! Thank you Lord!!! God always provides!

I want to thank everyone who has been encouraging me and praying for me!! you guys are great!!

Also another WONDERFUL thing that happened this week is...(drum roll please).....I got a job!! hehe! My best friend Sarah Anne Barlow(lol) hired me as her office manager! I mean come on who could have asked for a better boss! lol

I made a little **slideshow** for everyone to enjoy of Brooke! hehe I hope you like it!

Ps. "Did you get the memo cause I dont think I got that one!?" Hehe Sarah we are too funny! lol :)

I Need Your Help!!

Ok so many of you already know I plan on moving to Arizona!! Well I was there for 2 weeks so I could find a job and get settled in. I will be living with my brother and sister in law and nephew Brayden! I'm very excited! Well after I got a job offer I came back to Illinois to get Brooke and our things and also to tell Brooke's father that I am moving with Brooke. I came back on monday night however I got together with brookes dad on tuesday night and let me tell you it did not go well at all! He yelled at me the whole time telling me I*m being selfish by taking Brooke away from him and I*m giving up on life by not staying in IL. I didnt even get the chance to explain my points of view and my reasons because everytime I opened my mouth he would cut me off by getting emotional and either yelling at me or crying. Before I left Arizona I had a chance to talk to a very wise woman named Sandy that my brother introduced me to and she gave me some great advice about all of this, she told me to practice what I was gonna say to him, practice what my face was gonna look like, and prepare myself for the worst possible reaction because if i know how to handle that then i will know how to handle anything. So I did that, I remained calm and kept my face calm and kept my voice and attitude calm, and it worked for me but not for Aaron(brookes dad). He told me he's gonna fight for her. Then he left. Before he left he asked if he could have brooke thursday and friday(today) over night that way he could spend time with her before we leave. I didnt really wanna say yes but i thought it was only fair so i agreed. Later that night when i got home him mother called my house and my mom answer and his mother went crazy on my mom! She said a lot of VERY hurtful things about me! I mean saying that I*m unstable and I*m depressed and that I*m a bad mother along with alot of other things. For 2 hours she ranted and raved on the phone to my mom. I couldnt believe the nerve she had to say what she did. I made a choice then and there that my daughter was not gonna go over to their house for thursday adn friday because Aarons mother could not be trusted and i feared for my daughter. Lets just say Aaron was not too happy about that. And thursday morning at 10:30 am I got served. Court papers that is. Aaron is taking me to court for full custody of my daughter on the grounds that I am immature and irresponsible. I still cant believe all of this. My daughter is my life, my heart, and my pride and joy how could he try and take her from me!! This is the part where I need your help the most....I need all of you to PRAY!!!! Pray like you have never prayed before! Pray that Brooke will not be taken from me! Pray the I find a GREAT lawyer! Also pray that God some how brings me the money to pay for this lawyer seeing as i have none! I need all of you to join with me in believing that God is on my side and He would never let anything happen to me or my little girl! If any of you have any encouraging words I would love to hear them! This is a very emotionally trying time for me right now and I could use all the support I could get. So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE keep me and Brooke in your prayers!!! Thank you so much and I*ll keep you all posted on what happens!! Court starts monday!! I love you all! Thanks again!