"Did you get the memo??" lol

Being back home has opened my eyes to alot of different things and helped me make some pretty big decisions. I finally realized my place in the world and that is to be here in IL where my family friends and people who love and support me are. Not to say that the people like my brother sister in law and others in AZ dont love and support me; I*m just saying IL is where I need to be right now.

Sunday night I went over to the Barlow household which is always always a blessing for me in more ways than one! Going over there gave me a chance to sit down and talk with Joe and Nancy(who are like my 2nd parents to me) and talk about alot of things and pray about eveything that has really been going on with me on the inside and on the outside. They gave me an outsiders perspective about the decisions I have been making lately and showed me that I really need to make some life changes! I find myself getting a harsh dose of reality when i sit down and talk with them and maybe for some people that sucks but for me I couldnt be happier. Joe especially is willing to keep it real and not sugar coat things like alot of my friends and family often do. Thank God for that!

Monday was court and I was real nervous about it because I didn*t have enough time to hire an attorney. On the way to the court house God told me something that really put me at peace. Up until that moment I had heard nothing from God yet I keep praying. He told me in a very clear and bold voice "Debbie, I am your lawyer today!" WOW!! I was like ok God!! I mean seriously He blew me away! He also put in my head "If God is for us who can be against us" I kept repeating that over and over and over in my head. He really put peace in my heart! I went into that court room with God by myside! Aaron*s lawyer called me in the hallway and we reached an agreement to have this all moved to Kane county since he filed it in the wrong county b/c it was faster and cheaper for them. So Aaron has to pay a penalty fee for having it moved to the right county and I have a few more weeks till the next court date. Which also gave me time to hire my lawyer(which I did yesturday!!)! I*m now taking a stand in faith that God will provide the money for the lawyer fees! Thank you Lord!!! God always provides!

I want to thank everyone who has been encouraging me and praying for me!! you guys are great!!

Also another WONDERFUL thing that happened this week is...(drum roll please).....I got a job!! hehe! My best friend Sarah Anne Barlow(lol) hired me as her office manager! I mean come on who could have asked for a better boss! lol

I made a little **slideshow** for everyone to enjoy of Brooke! hehe I hope you like it!

Ps. "Did you get the memo cause I dont think I got that one!?" Hehe Sarah we are too funny! lol :)

I Need Your Help!!

Ok so many of you already know I plan on moving to Arizona!! Well I was there for 2 weeks so I could find a job and get settled in. I will be living with my brother and sister in law and nephew Brayden! I'm very excited! Well after I got a job offer I came back to Illinois to get Brooke and our things and also to tell Brooke's father that I am moving with Brooke. I came back on monday night however I got together with brookes dad on tuesday night and let me tell you it did not go well at all! He yelled at me the whole time telling me I*m being selfish by taking Brooke away from him and I*m giving up on life by not staying in IL. I didnt even get the chance to explain my points of view and my reasons because everytime I opened my mouth he would cut me off by getting emotional and either yelling at me or crying. Before I left Arizona I had a chance to talk to a very wise woman named Sandy that my brother introduced me to and she gave me some great advice about all of this, she told me to practice what I was gonna say to him, practice what my face was gonna look like, and prepare myself for the worst possible reaction because if i know how to handle that then i will know how to handle anything. So I did that, I remained calm and kept my face calm and kept my voice and attitude calm, and it worked for me but not for Aaron(brookes dad). He told me he's gonna fight for her. Then he left. Before he left he asked if he could have brooke thursday and friday(today) over night that way he could spend time with her before we leave. I didnt really wanna say yes but i thought it was only fair so i agreed. Later that night when i got home him mother called my house and my mom answer and his mother went crazy on my mom! She said a lot of VERY hurtful things about me! I mean saying that I*m unstable and I*m depressed and that I*m a bad mother along with alot of other things. For 2 hours she ranted and raved on the phone to my mom. I couldnt believe the nerve she had to say what she did. I made a choice then and there that my daughter was not gonna go over to their house for thursday adn friday because Aarons mother could not be trusted and i feared for my daughter. Lets just say Aaron was not too happy about that. And thursday morning at 10:30 am I got served. Court papers that is. Aaron is taking me to court for full custody of my daughter on the grounds that I am immature and irresponsible. I still cant believe all of this. My daughter is my life, my heart, and my pride and joy how could he try and take her from me!! This is the part where I need your help the most....I need all of you to PRAY!!!! Pray like you have never prayed before! Pray that Brooke will not be taken from me! Pray the I find a GREAT lawyer! Also pray that God some how brings me the money to pay for this lawyer seeing as i have none! I need all of you to join with me in believing that God is on my side and He would never let anything happen to me or my little girl! If any of you have any encouraging words I would love to hear them! This is a very emotionally trying time for me right now and I could use all the support I could get. So PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE keep me and Brooke in your prayers!!! Thank you so much and I*ll keep you all posted on what happens!! Court starts monday!! I love you all! Thanks again!

New Beginnings Are Much Needed

(The 1st pic is Az, 2nd is obvious, 3rd is RI)

So as many of you know I am no longer in Illinois. I got on a bus on July 31st at 7pm and I didnt arrive at my final desptination until wednesday at noon! My destination might u be wondering?? Newport Rhode Island! I have a friend that lives there so last minute we decided to do all this and i stayed with her! Newport was AMAZING!!!! I went to the beach i went to Providence to sight see and i went to the mall! Everyone was so darn nice! Its like a whole different world over there! It goes with out saying tho that i loved it! I miss everyone so much! Ashley and Kristen completed me! It was like we were so much alike yet we lived 1200 miles away from eachother! Wierd! OMG i have to tell ya that they have the YUMMIEST drink over there called coffee milk! Its like chocolate milk but with coffee syrup instead but it doesnt have ne coffee in it!!! sounds gross but omg it was the best!!!!!!!!!

I bet you guys are wondering why i left huh? Well im not gonna get into all the details but i will say that i am sick of all the drama that there is in Geneva, Saint Charles, and Batavia. Its all immature and i just got plain fed up with it along with other personal issues that i have been dealing for some time now. But I*m better now that i left.

Although the bus took my to Rhode Island, a plane took me to Arizona on sunday! Thats right I said a PLANE!(First time flyer right here! Dont act so shocked ive lived a sheltered life) When I was in Rhode Island I recieved a call from my brother saying he missed me and he understood what i was going through. He also asked me to come live with him. I accepted! so now I am in Arizona but i will be back in chicago in a few weeks because brooke is still there with my parents so i will be coming back for my little "shmookles" lol thats her nickname!! I miss her like crazy!!! But moving here to Arizona has to be one of the best things i have ever done!!! Just keep me in prayer!!!